Xmi tettɣuffut ur tettif ɣir balkun nni akukkuḥ ad ɣrs tffɣ ad trr nnfs. Tkssi tiṭṭawin g ujnna, tettsara gs. Tsslqqa udm i lfwaḥ n tnwwacin n ymmas, tettnaḍur amya d wamya gi zznqt nsn, txwa, tettṣffar, ittett gs wuccn s uzil. Iwdan issidf itn Kufid ar tudrin.
Ass nni mig t tẓra, ila tlha tettḥsab tiburjwin iqqnen d tinni irẓmn. Zi lbda ittɛjib as ad tḥsb timslayin: ttumubinat, iḍarn i dd iɛddan x taddart nsn, tikṭṭufin ittmẓuɣurn jr n lluṣa d ultmas, tizbibin g udmawn n ywdan, tcabbat n bastili ittraḥn ar ufrran.
Lḥsab ila ittfkka tt zi lqnḍ d isqsan umi ur tettif trarit. Zi tmɣar, tdwl tettḥsab itran d tyyita n wul ins xmi tettsla i iɣnnijn n tayri. Iwulkmanen lbda ugln as ar imẓẓuɣn, d ntnin i tt ittɛacarn gi twarḥit d twasit, g uɣimi d ubddi, s uzli niɣ s llilt.
Amsrwas n wussan gi tili n kufid ataf sɣḍṣn tt gi tisi mri maci d lḥsab nni, balkun nni d iɣnnijn nni. Iqṭṭa uṣbbn d ujffef d umsaḥ n tɛjjuja, ur qṭṭin wussan. Ittɣima as ɣir uxtuttl x tfdnin ḥtta ad tṣar gi txubict nni mays tettsajja x umaḍal.
Maca zi ila amaḍal ins d tiburjwin, tinwwacin, aqttus n ujnna i tettwala d twwura xmi rẓẓmnt ttqnent s tazzla, zi wass nni mig t tẓra, amaḍal ins idwl d ntta.
Amxmi ggin awal ad xzrn g wayaywa gi twala. Ntta ila ijbbd girru, nttat ila twwḍ gi lḥsab ar tburjwt mays ibdd. Wami ɣa msaggrn lxzrat nsn, ur tuki ci s uskikkḍ n tḥjijjatin gi tɛddist, tuka s tmssi trɣa as g wudm. Zɣil as qqaɛ rran as dd lxbar.
Ikmz mis ila tettḥsab, indi as gi tiṭawin nican i wnni astiqa tettlaɣa yas. Ntta iwḍa as girru zg ufus, ixzr amya d wamya idwl ixzr gs, inna as s uciyyar, nc?.
Twwi tt d taḍwayt ar dixl, tnfft itt tidi amxmi dd trwwḥ zg wagam. Tkka kraḍ n wussan ur tffiɣ ar balkun, tḥṭṭa t zi trffaḍin n tburjwt n uxxam ins. Mrmi ma tzlm it din ad tdwl mtkarmin. Ijj n wass tqqim tetrraḥ tettaṣ dd gi kumidur, tettraḥ tettas dd, tssadaf iḍuḍan g wayawya. Ymmas ur tuki tssiyyb xs tcankla, min cm yuɣn a ẓẓmar, tsdwwxd ay, yak illinin i tssirded ifassn, cḥal zi lwswas? Tsmmar g umkan ur tufi min ɣa tini, tɛda ijjt n tzhzit d tamqqrant ɛad i tbbt ila ymmas tnnas ci nnɣni. Tnnurẓm as twwurt n ujnna. Wami d ay tnna ymma sessu nnwar, ad sseswɣ nnwar, maɣar u ssessiwɣ nnwar tqqar wḥḥds whḥds x ubrid ar kuzina ad tccar aman gi tṣḍilt. X ubrid n tdwla zi kuzina, ur gs tqqim ci zzɛamt nni i tt yudfn ɛla ɣfla. Bdan ttarjijjin as iḍarn, tzwɣ tsugg as ɛawd x wudm d ci am, am… wllh ila d ntnint, d tiḥjijjajin, ila zɣil ay ttunt ay. Cwit ataf tnndlf gi tnbdadt n twwurt n balkun, aman ttzllaɛn gi tmurt. Tssnt zi nwwacin iwalan ar kumidur, azllif ittɛwwal ad yadf gi maṣita. Twwḍ ar tinni iwalan ar zznqt maca, ixssa ad tmlulli bzzez xs. S tikli n kamira tadqlant i tqqim tsgɛɛad azllif ins ar wami, am twala tamzgarut, mqabaln, udm g udm, tiṭawin gi tiṭawin, ul g ul. Mri issawal nnwar i tssessaw ataf inna as ikfa ay qa tsɛummd ay, aman ittzllaɛn zi tmwwa wwḍn as ar iḍarn nttat g ijj n yilel nnɣni. Ataf tqqim tfṭṭḥ gs i lbda mri ur tggi ymmas aɛiyyḍ nni i d as isnuruyn ashay.
Zi ssin, mani a Nadya, ad ssesswɣ nnwar a ymma, bbɛɛd i nnwar inu a tuhart ad tssrcid, ur tggwd ci a ymma qa ssnɣ as, mani ɛawd, ad sskkɣ balkun a ymma, i lux min din ɣa tggd, ttuɣ din ssibiyyu a ymma.
Cḥal ila d as ittɛjib ad tfrrj g itcallutn nni umi ttnjbadn ifassn, izllifn, iḍarn. Ttṣarn s iḍarn g ijj n umkan ntnin aqa tn g umkan nnɣni. Mri tufa ad as tzmr ad tjbd ifassn ula d nttat, ad awḍn mani ittili, niɣ ad tmmksi tkml ad tṣar akis maca lxyal ins ad iqqim mani illa. Ila zɣil as ur tifn min ɣa inin i wayaywa bla tutlayt n yils, ssaɛa lbda tettxssa asn lwqt ad kmmln amhawaḍ n tiṭawin. Aqa ck mliḥ? Yyih i cm? Mliḥ uka tssidr tiṭawin s usdḥi. Min tettggd? Aqa ay ssessawɣ tiwarẓiyyin, aɣ ak ictn. Umm, lfwaḥ ins isbuhluy am cm. Ayt d suyt taddart ur fhimn mays d as tkka tzwɣ g udm, qqarn as qa yusi dd akim uxmml. Nttat lbda ila tsxxḍ x kufid, g usan nni ur qqimn ttslan i uniɛẓeẓ ins.
Raḥn wussan usin dd. Tusi dd nnubt n iwulkmanen. Umi tettslid? Muk d as ɣa tini umi tettsla? Tudf ar taddart, turi gi twriqt ism n uɣnnij umi tettsla, tksi itt am wi ikssin llafita gi lmudaḥara. Min imsarn zi ssin tsawnt ad kidsn t awin ar imḍlan, mizi ur tn ittimn ḥdd. Jr asn, gi wazzarg nni n lxawi yugln jr n tburjwt d ubalkun, tettwassu tẓarbit amxmi x tmurt i tmmrs, ɣrs i ugurn bddn as g ummas, din i msaɣan, cḍḥn x llɣa n “Dance me to the end of love”, amṣawaḍ i ffudn.
Wami dd rẓmn tiṭawin kul ijjn g umkan ins, cḥal ikkan ɛad issnen may llan.
Ammn i dd wwin tmsaggarn gi lmraḥ yugln, ṭṭawn yimanen nsen x wafriwn n uẓawan, ttsaran amɣrad ttdwaln dd. Ur jjin aɣnnij azayku ula d amaynu isnhzza ulawn nsn ur xs munen gi may nnumen.
Mri xasn ntnin, ataf anuffar ammn i yqqim. Ataf iwdan ur ttidfn ur ttfɣn ḥuma ur tn iẓrr ḥdd. Zi mrussnen aynni i wwḍn ḥṭtan, ur qqimn ttsnnadn x ssur n balkun (nttat) ula x tnbdadt n tburjwt (ntta), ṭṭaxarn cwit ar dixl, ḥdd ur tn ittwili, ntnin ttwalan iwdan. Wi issnen tayri d min tswa, mala twwi t idd iɛda ssin, ad yaka s tsfay i din ittmlawan.
Maca kulci iqṭṭa, xlli d anuffar nni i tn ismunen ikmml. Yusi dd wass mig jjin iwdan lṣwar ḥuma ad drrɛn lɛwin n tlelli. Ussan nni izgurn ufuɣ, msfhamn ad mmẓrn brra. Ur nnin ci mukas, maca nttat tssn ila ad as afn, ad as afn. Tixḍar arruḍ i ɣa tls, takmamt i kisn dd ittasn, amcaḍ i ɣa tgg, Thrra ifassn i txxla llixiyya s krima ḥuma ad rḍbn cway. Tjrrb xlli d tikli zdat n tisit d wawal amzgaru i dd ɣa tssufɣ. Twwi dd xirbbi tssawal akis s tutlayin nnɣni, d akud ad inḍq yils ins s min ignu d tayri.
Ass amazgaru, tffɣ ag ymmas, twḍḍr asnt tikli tikarmin n uḥbbs nni i tnt iqqnen ar tmurt. Ymmas tettxnnas i ywdan ḥuma ur d as ssiɣin kuruna, nttat tnṭṭḥ gsn s tiṭawin mnqal ur gs tettkk. Wwint rrant, sxxrnt, skutant, ur d as tufi tẓaɣart jr n ywdan ad as tini ci xlli s tiṭawin. Ass wis sin, tẓra t, mri dd ittffɣ wul s nnit ataf iṣar as i ntta g ufus.
Ntta maca ur tt iẓri ci i tnwa, mizi ur gs ixzir, waxxa iɛda dd ṭṭarf ins. Ass wis kraḍ ur tffiɣ ci, tugi ymmas. Ass wis smmus, mix dd tusa ymmas ad kids tffɣ ira tṣar gi ddruj, aqa ay dwlɣ dd a ymma, ad dd sɣeɣ lxmira i wɣrum. Tjja ymmas tettjaw s umnɣi, tẓwa zznqt ar uṣḍdir may izddɣ. May ɣa tkk? Mani xs ɣa tɣli? Traḥ, tusa dd, walu. Traḥ a tḥanut, tudf, tsnɛmil trzzu x ci, tffɣ dd. Zdat ins i t tufa, ɛlayn ataf tkka gs amuk gi bilikulat. Maca rid am bililkulat, mizi nttat trzu g uxzzar ins x uẓuyt, timxsa d imzri n umlqi, ur tn tufi.
Ntta, zi gs iḥqq mliḥ ixsar xs cwit n ɣarm a ultma, yunf it uka yudf ad isxxar.
Min tkka tggur x ubrid ar taddart, nttat tettḥsab s unixses tiluṣatin, tinbdadin n twwura, tikmamin i immnḍrn gi tmurt, tidarjatin n taddart nsn, waḥit “ur”, tnayn “d ay”, tlata “iiiiiiii”, arbɛa “ur”, xmsa “d ay”, sbɛa, mri ur tt idd tlqi ymmas ataf ar twwurt i twḍa. Ur, mi cm yuɣn? Ur d ay, min? Bsmillah ɛlim a tsa inu, min din?.
Ur d ay iɛqil ci a ymma! Man wn a yllis n lḥram? Waxxa tssn ila ad tcc aɛmud d abuhali, tmsiyyab g udrriɛ n ymmas, tslu din ul d min iksi.
